this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
She bit a glass in half.
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
