You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
