And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
