We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize