Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
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