I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
His hands were made for my vagina.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
