So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
