I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
It's never too late to be topless.
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize
