I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
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