I hope my margaritas pass through security.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
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