just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
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