You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
