I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
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