Why are handjobs necessary in class?
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
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