i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
