I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Randomize
