i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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