Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
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