Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
Randomize
