Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Randomize