oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
I wish life had little blips of pornography
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
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