i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
wrigley field is MILF paradise
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
We're not piercing ourselves today.
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
