So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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