scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
Its 6am. Um if my mom for some reasons asks, you stopped by my house around ten and had some wine with me. She is concerned I drank a whole bottle by myself. Woke me at 6am to interrogate..Thank god my pounding head thinks fast.
PS We had chips too. She is less concerned about the whereabouts of the chips but still a good lie always needs detail.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
Randomize
