I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
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