So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
