i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
