Whod you bang
I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Randomize
