Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
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