I drank too much. My snot smells like vodka when I blow my nose.
so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
