I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
