Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Randomize
