Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
So for two years my friend Mark has been building a catapult in his basement. Yesterday he realized it's too big to get it out.
You need to give me a reason immediately why he is your friend.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
