I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
Randomize
