So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
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