Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
