If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
im holly from the hills drunk
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
