obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Randomize
