You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
Also, beer. Big fan.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
Randomize