I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Randomize
