Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Randomize
