you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize
