I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize
