i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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