exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Randomize
