First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
You can't just leave with hair like that
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
Randomize
