i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize
