see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
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