You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize
