How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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