I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
Im at a strip club, and the dancer just farted into my face. The bad part about that is I could taste the wings I bought her earlier
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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